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TT1124.93
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1995-11-01
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1KB
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30 lines
November 24, 1993
Senator Packwood's Top Ten Dating Tips
10. Use the word "alleged" a lot
9. Two words: transparent pants
8. Practice before date by groping a sack of potatoes
7. Gerrymander her constituency (if you know what I mean)
6. Surefire holiday gag: Offer her a "Christmas Goose"
*At this point, the Top Ten List display on the screen goes haywire, and Hal
tells Dave to just continue reading the list, without the onscreen text*
5. Always wear thick rubber gloves when fondling radioactive material
*Now, Hal puts up the blank Top Ten background, without any text*
4. Great opening line: "How would you like to be in my diary?"
*Dave tells Hal to just fade to black, and they'll pretend they're on radio,
and Hal does just that*
3. Pretend to get phone call, tell her it's the President, and he says it's
vitally important that I put my hand on your thigh
2. Always make Lorena Bobbitt walk through metal detector
1. Chicks dig senators
**BTW: This entire screw-up was entirely unintentional**